MatthewJCruz

Goodmorning…I used to be one of you. I know how you think and the Biblical brainwashing you have been through that makes you think the way you do about world events, Biblical prophecy, the Second Coming of Jesus and the Kingdom of God on earth. I know how ministers and pastors, most well meaning, but full of sanctified ignorance and misunderstanding of the intent, origins, errancy and the historical inaccuracies of much we read in the Bible, have filled your minds with misguided zeal. I know how you read and understand the prophecies of the four kingdoms of Daniel and the dreams of Nebuaccanezzar, King of Babylon. I doubt you know they were written after the fact and not prophetically.

I know how you read Daniel 11 and 12 as just how things will be “in the end times.” I know how some of you think “a thousand will fall at your right side, and ten thousand at your left, but it will not come nigh unto your dwelling.” I know how you read Matthew 24. I know some of you think that you will be “born up on eagles wings” and taken to a “place of safety,” maybe in Petra, Jordan to wait out the end time carnage that you see in the Trumpets, Vials, plagues and Horsemen of Revelation. Some of you have already left and some left years ago, only to return and get back to work.

I know you read the Book of Revelation as if it was a newspaper and see these times as those times and that book as revealing all that is about to happen so Jesus can return. I know you have forgotten that 2000 years ago the opening of the Revelation says “to show unto my servants, things which must SHORTLY, come to pass.” I know that you view “shortly” differently than most people understand “shortly.” I know some of you think you are part of the exclusive 144,000 thousand. I know you don’t understand Gematria or the 12 signs of the Zodiac but I spare you.

I know that even though you know Paul said Jesus for sure would come in his lifetime, and that he was among the “We, who are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord, shall be caught up together with the Lord, and WE shall be saved,” was wrong. I know you know that later in his life, Paul gave up on Jesus coming for him in his lifetime and said that he had fought a good fight, kept the faith and would have to settle for a crown of righteousness that he’d get later, but not soon anymore. I know you know that Paul motivated the church to not marry the loves of their lives, give lots of money to the church and be ready to go at a moments notice, in vain. I always wonder about the people who believe what Paul said about the times being short and it being better to not marry and be like him. Did they get really bitter when their lives passed and Jesus didn’t return, nor did they get to be intimate with the ones they loved because Paul said not to? I bet they did anyway, just like today in all churches who try to regulate relationships. The minister gets to rant about such things, but most just sneak around and do what they want anyway. You can thank Paul and his misquided view of the immediacy of Jesus return in HIS lifetime for the skepticism of most.

I know that you know Jesus said in Matthew 24 that “this generation shall not a pass until all these things be fulfilled” and that since we now know it was not the generation of Jesus this happened for, Jesus was not ill informed, but rather meant that the generation that these things happened in, would see it through. This allows your pastor to motivate you by drawing your attention to all that is happening in your world as proof of this being all about YOU. That’s the apologetic, but that is not what Jesus, who was mistaken about this meant, when he is aleged to have said it. I know that you know “no man knows the day or the hour, but the Father only,” but choose to ignore that and predict, predict, predict to put fear, fear, fear, into each other. Or as one said, “Just because we don’t know the day or the hour doesn’t mean we can’t know the month or the year.” Right… I know your ministers tell you that Jesus will return in 3 or 5 or not more than 10 years, and they are wrong, but hopeful and of course, the fear and hope of it keeps you in your seats and giving the bucks.

I know that the gayness of some people, the lack of belief of others, the movies, TV and all the events going on in the Middle East are proof that you won’t have to wait much longer for Jesus. Little does the Pastor know that out of every 100 members of his church, about 10 are going to be gay by nature and that the same would be true for the 100 of the clergy he got together with at his last ministerial conference where they condemned it. I know you know that all fundamentalist college campuses have a normal number of gay students in attendance. Or maybe you don’t. I know they are in denial on this topic but I spare you. Oh, and this would include the faculty of course.

I know you believe the nation of Israel is the most special of God’s holy nations and that as one man said to me, “anyone who picks on Israel, is challenging God himself.” I know you don’t believe that anyone who picks on Afghanistan is picking on God. I have to say that meme has gone a long way to insure the safety of that small rather troublesome piece of the planet. The tales of the Old Testament have insured that the rules and ways of an obscure deity, on an obscure mountain, in an obscure land, speaking to an obscure people about obscure and dictatorial and controlling obcure practices, are relevant to today. They mostly aren’t. My experience is that when a nation, government, president, church or group “can do no wrong,” wrong is all they get good at. I know you know that too but don’t apply it to the group you associate with. You should.

I know you are told you are special and that others are not. I know that you are told you are chosen and called, while others are not chosen and not called. I know you believe you have special saving knowledge while others are lost. I know you are told that you are true and others false. I know you are led to believe that your thinking is correct on all topics biblical and prophectic and all others are wrong. I know you can’t imagine you are wrong about a hundred biblical ideas and speculations, but you are. I know you think that this President was put in power by God himself but I am not sure that you know that even he says he hears the voice of God, which is why he went to war. I know when others hear the voice of God in your local congregation, you marginalize them and think they are weird and strange or may need help. But on a national scale, you seem to accept the voice of God in the heads of men who can start a war that leads to everything BUT the Second Coming. I know you can’t imagine having to clean up after such a mistake because I know you can’t imagine any biblical or prophetic mistakes being made. But they are being made big time and cleaning up after the shit hits the fan, may be all you get to do, and of course, ask the pastor what went wrong and where is Jesus? Oh, you’ll also get to ask why you can’t afford to live and why your job ended and you lost everything you worked hard for. You’ll also learn the church won’t be able to help you much then, and no, you can’t have any of your tithe money back to get back on your feet. That was money you gave to God and he has already spent it. I know you don’t know that 100% of all endtime prophecies made by fundamentalist and evangelical TV Preechers, have failed miserably. I know…just around the corner.

I know you are afraid to die personally just as every human being before you has. I know you, like Paul, prefer to be “changed,” at the sound of the trumpet and not die at all. After all, Paul said “we would not all die.” I am not sure you realize he had to retract that later in life.

I know how you feel about “God’s Law” and how much better off we’d all be if we kept “it.” But I also know you aren’t real sure which ones to keep. Sabbath over Sunday? Passover over Easter? Holydays over holidays? I know some think parents should still get to stone rebellious children. I know you are nuts if you think that. I know you that “God’s Law” means different things to differrent people and I know that you tend to confuse what to keep from the Old Testament nation of Israel and drag it over into the New and the Church. Well except tithing of course. I know how you think we are all spiritual Israelites, but how would you feel if someone kept calling you a spiritual Zulu in order to be saved? How about a Spiritual Sioux? Actually I’d love that but that’s my preference.

I also know, because I was one of you, that you don’t know near as much as you think you know. You’re knowing is, at times, wishful thinking, or sanctified ignorance based on the sole fact that it’s what you have always been taught. I know that learning new perspectives is not something you are encouraged to do. I know that admitting you are wrong is not something you are often able to do. When science makes a mistake, it admits it and uses whatever information was good for future studies. When religion and churches make mistakes, they kill the people who point it out. That’s how it goes.

But I also know that over zealous pastors and fundamentalists need to be cautioned about your zealotry gone wrong. Zealous and sanctified ignorance can provoke all the Vials, Trumpets, Trombones and Beasts of Revelation and you will get everything promoted in the Book of Revelation EXCEPT the Second Coming. What you will get is one big mess to clean up, if you survive along with the rest of us. You’ll get a place in history as the reason why the next generation wants nothing to do with organized religion or ministers and pastors who can’t admit they are wrong and it’s not all about them after all. You’ll reap a whirlwind but not Kingdom of God to bale you out.

While the President may or may not have said, “God told me to strike at Sadaam and I did…”, it has never in the history of the planet worked out well when society has let religion call the shots as to what is and what isn’t. I know you know that. I just hope you will think long and hard about the chaos fundamentalism of any kind, Islamic or Christian can bring to the lives of well meaning humans who simply want to be left alone to live, learn and love without the drama of religious ignorance.

Below is one of the questions people ask me often. The situation is one that is not uncommon when it comes to erotic power exchange: one of the partners wants it, the other doesn’t. Hopefully this question and answer will help others.

The Question

“I am looking for information that might cover the troubles that crop up in a relationship, particularly in a marriage, when one partner reveals his/her tendencies towards BDSM. I am the vanilla spouse of a man who believes he is dominant. We have been married eight years, and until about two years ago, I had no clue he had such interests. We have done some experimentation since he “came out,” but I do not find any of it appealing at all. It’s possible that the circumstances of some of our encounters turned me off to it all, but trust me, the turn off is permanent.

I apologize for the intimate and personal tone of this e-mail, but I am rather desperate. We are about to seek counseling (ug! but it’s necessary), but something tells me that I will find no answers there, that the focus will be on why he is the way he is. I AM grateful to have found your website. The listing of stages is MOST enlightening.”

My answer

Thank you for bringing up the question, because it is one many people have problems with. Let us start with saying that erotic power exchange emotions are not likely to disappear. Although science still has not determined exactly what determines our sexual preferences, it is becoming apparant that at least a substantial part of it is genetically encoded. Your husband is obviously facing a huge personal problem (and as a result so are you) that is not an easy nut to crack. Even though he may probably try to shelf his emotions for now, they are very likely to pop up again in the future and it is not unlikely they will become stronger, since he may try to shelf his emotions; the basic feelings and the fantasies will still be there. That brings a lot of strain in your relationship, no doubt.

There is very little or no literature on this. It boils down to incompatibality of partners (which is not uncommon - with or without erotic power exchange).

Having said this, the situation is probably not completely hopeless. We’ll get to that in a minute. First however another warning. You are very right in saying that erotic power exchange (even without “the act”) is a form of sexuality, hence there is indeed no erotic power exchange without sex. Having a play partner outside the relationship is a form many find to cope with problems like these. Does that work? Usually not. There are a couple of risks involved in such a set up:

* the erotic power exchange will bring out feelings and emotions between the two playing. Emotions that weren’t there before - at least not in a “live” situation. The play partners are very likely to bond, the non-playing spouse will feel left out and the other will be torn between two different people he (as in this case) shares his emotions with;

* “play without sex” is what many people will suggest to start with. You can take our word for it that some sort of “active sex” will evolve soon, since the tension built up in active play requires a release AND builds up sexual needs;

* since erotic power exchange to most people are very dear, personal and treasured emotions, sharing them with someone will automatically lead to a special bond that will grow and things that should not be in there will also slip in, even if the play partners sincerely do not want that to happen.

Hence, unless you find a commercial play partner (prostitute, which in this case is very unlikely because there are very little sub-prostitutes) you pay for playing but do do build up any “relationship” with, the risks of such a solution are huge. And you are right, you would have to agreee to all this too and cope with it.

Now, to the question, is this hopeless? Probably not. Without even knowing about exactly what has happened between the two of you so far it is likely things have started on the wrong foot and your husband is asking too much. Even without the specific dominant/submissive dynamics there are very little women that will not be attracted to “exciting” eroticism and sexuality (even though you may have to accept yourself and your desires first). Mind you, we are not going to throw the “you are submissive but you don’t know that yet” routine on you, because that is nonsense.

However, do try and envisage the following situation: you are blindfolded (with something soft like silk) and all he does is carress you, arouse you, kiss you all over, maybe tickle you a bit and undertakes every effort to seduce you. No whips, no ropes and cuffs, no heavy leather stuff, just a blindfold, maybe a glass of wine, candle light, soft music, comfort, enjoyment and MOST IMPORTANTLY, no stress. Just pure and simple enjoyment. Chances are you’d like that very much and this IS an erotic power exchange setting where you leave it to him to work his butt off to seduce you, while he will be the one that has the initiative and these are exactly the dynamics that we are really talking about.

Something like the above - and please take out the strain and the stress, forget about being called slave, calling him master or anything, forget about the fact that this is erotic power exchange, just enjoy - might be pure and simple joy and fun. There are a lot of other simple ways to bring out the same eroticism. For example, allow him to “order” you to cook a wonderful candlelight dinner for the two of you. That will probably make a nice entree to pure enjoyment too.

The examples above are simple and very erotic and intimate forms of role play without all the heavy stuff and they - or other ways - may bring about a wonderful way to experience what you yourself like and what not. Letting him pick your clothes for a change, you doing simple things to please him and he being receptive to that and responding to it, all of that is erotic power exchange and that may appeal to him as well as to you without the heavy stuff. The idea is to learn and play and BOTH try and experiment with FUN things, without the stress, the need, etcetera.

Will this go further? Who is to say. That totally depends on the two of you. But do try. It isn’t as scary as it seems as you can see (or at least it doesn’t have to be). It offers both of you a possibility to explore, for him to learn and understand that the trick (in any erotic power exchange setting) is subtlety and NOT the heavy stuff (most of what you see is pornography and has little to do with the things people do in their homes).

By all means do talk about this, communicate and exchange what both of you can and can not do. That goes for you too and should be respected.

Hans Meijer is a former Dutch journalist, now chairman of the Powerotics Foundation and the author of several e-books about erotic power exchange and other alternative lifestyles.

Dating isn???t as easy a proposition as it seems. The situation becomes even more muddled when you opt for the online version of the same. What exactly are you or the other person is looking for is a confusing reality. Equally confusing is the situation where you don???t know how genuine the feelings of your dating partner are. Does such mind boggling situations make you ponder over the pros and cons of online and offline dating services? What is better and more likely to get you what you require-love, lust, friendship or companionship?

Offline dating service is still surviving but it???s the online dating service that is actually thriving! More and more adults are now opting for the online version owing to its vast database of potential partners- black, gay partners, single, young, old et al. Hence, you are likely to find more dating choices in accordance with the attributes that you key in.

When it comes to online dating service, anonymity is the key and that???s where adult online dating service scores over the offline one. For understandable reasons you might not want to reveal your true identity at the initial stages. Online service gives you that freedom to guide the relationship in accordance with your whims and fancies.

Meeting complete strangers, even for adults, is not a great idea. Imagine the possibility of getting to know the person, talking with himher over the internet or phone before taking the final plunge. This definitely places you in a much better situation. Even mature adults might not feel it worthwhile to go for meets with complete strangers through an offline dating service and hence we witness more and more of them finally settling down with the online option.

At times of loneliness, at times when you feel the need and urge for a partner or at times when you need a shoulder to rest on, trust the online adult dating service that facilitates meetings with various kinds of people (who are seeking a date just like you) and for all kinds of purposes. Outnumbering the offline adult dating services by a few notches, the online version is sure to fetch you what you are seeking.

Know more about Online Dating and other Entertainment services here.

Air Supply continued its East Coast summer tour with a stop in Ridgefield, CT. The former high school auditorium hosts great performers and Air Supply left an indelible impression on these Ridgefield residents! Nestled in a small community near Danbury, CT, this epicenter was within driving distance for Airheads coming from Massachusetts, New York, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania.

On Friday night in Endicott, I think someone must have given Graham an extra shot of jumping juice because he was springing all over the stage. Tigger was bouncing so much he nearly toppled over once when he lost his balance landing one of his turnarounds! I’m guessing that same someone gave Russell a happy pill because for two days, he never stopped smiling. This may seem like an odd statement, but having been to more than a few shows, I can tell that some performances are more fantastic than others. All of Air Supply’s concerts are fabulous, but when one person’s energy level is outstanding, I think it’s worth noting.

I have previously commented on performances from Jed, Mike and Jonni so I think it’s only fair that I compliment Russell and his performances on Friday and Saturday. I haven’t seen him smile or seem to enjoy the performances this much since the Laughlin shows last November. He’s always great on stage and I’ve never heard him miss a note. But there are times when notes are incredibly pure, smiles take away sadness, and passion electrifies the room. Friday and Saturday were such times and I compliment and thank Russell for all that he gives.

The set list in Ridgefield was similar to the set lists in the past, and we were fortunate enough to hear Graham sing three songs from The Future; The Future, Make You Mine and Lace and Leather. It has been some time since I’ve heard Jed, Mike and Jonni perform Live and Let Die, and it was great to hear it again on Saturday. Added to the set was Every Woman In The World. Having heard it on Friday night, I had hoped it would be added to the set list on Saturday so I could try to get a video clip of it. It was, and I did.

Saturday’s show was relaxed and filled with levity. The audience knew every song lyric, every note, and sang loudly and in key. They were appreciative and many gave Air Supply its due respect with a standing ovation during many parts of the concert.

One of my favorite parts of the night was when the band left the stage and Graham and Russell talked about their early years in Australia. As they told some stories I haven’t heard before, the audience laughed non stop, enjoying a shared moment with two icons clearly instrumental to the happiness in their lives.

As Graham began to tell us how he and Russell used to play pizza shops, he mentioned that every time he tells this story he can smell the cheese wafting across the stage. He and Russell laughed, recalling the smell of roasting cheese.

Graham continued to talk about their very early start as musicians in Australia and told the audience that they once opened for AC/DC. Graham said, ???That???s when we wore white!??? Russell, laughing, said they don???t do that anymore. Graham then commented that he believed that???s how all the rumors started and he began to move on to another part of the story. But Russell quickly asked Graham, ???What rumors???? Not hearing Russell, Graham said, ???what???? and Russell repeated, ???what rumors???? Still not hearing Russell, he again said, ???What? I can???t hear you???? Russell then walked over to Graham and said, ???What rumors are those???? and Graham laughed.

Graham then told us that the rumors were ???so ridiculous???SO RIDICULOUS??? that they don???t comment on them to justify them. He and Russell then had a good laugh along with the audience.

Graham began to move on and then stopped and said he wanted to tell us something. He said, ???This isn???t part of the show???but it is now.??? He asked Russell if he remembered the raffles, or something like that. Russell nodded and Graham told him to tell the story because he tells it much better.

Russell began to tell us that in the early days, they used to play in the RSLs (Returned and Services League ??” for Australian Veterans) in Australia. He gave us a little Australian slang lesson and told us that Chook is slang for chicken. So he told us that they would have these chook raffles in the RSLs where they were playing. They???d be back in the hall somewhere and ???would be playing ???lost in love and I don???t know much??? and the PA would start and this girl would go ???Number 47, you???ve won the chook raffle. Number 47 please come to the front.???

Graham, Russell and the audience were cracking up because of the way Russell told the story. It was hilarious! Russell then commented, ???We don???t do that anymore??? and Graham added, ???We don???t go to raffles anymore.??? Russell immediately quipped, ???Only in Singapore,??? to which Graham replied, ???Oooh, one in a row!??? I???ve been told that Graham likes to make this comment when someone makes a joke???one in a row! Pretty funny! Graham then introduced us to Two Less Lonely People and everyone’s moods were high.

Not being able to venture out into the audience the night before in Endicott, NY, Graham and Russell did walk out into the crowd, much to the delight of the fans. There were hugs and handshakes, and kisses and a few hearts that skipped a beat! The audience joined in at the end of the verse and Air Supply received yet another standing ovation.

Air Supply rounded out the evening with the usual songs and the audience was in heaven. Russell told us how Air Supply was beginning an extensive international tour that includes Japan and Europe and that they would only be home for two days before they were off to New York next week. He then extended an invitation to ‘come get closer’ and close we got. At one point I looked back to the auditorium and not one person was sitting. Even the patrons in the balcony seats were on their feet. The audience sang, appreciated, applauded and loved.

I had been sitting next two two women who frequently come to shows at the Ridgefield Playhouse. They came to see Air Supply because they liked them but also because they go to a lot of shows in their town. As we exited the auditorium I asked how they liked the show, as they had previously commented how wonderful Graham was, singing his songs from The Future. The two women were over the moon! They were on a true Air Supply high. You all know the one that I mean! One of the women, LaVerle, commented that she was once again in love…with Jed. She said he was gorgeous and one of the hottest guys she’s seen! She said, if only she were 20 years younger…he would be perfect for her! I reminded her that Air Supply would be at Mohegan Sun a mere two weeks from now and I think I convinced her and MaryAnn to come to see our boys again! Chalk one up for the good guys; I think we just added two new Airheads!

As always, thanks go out to Sparky, Brett, Moe, Nate and Mark. Without them, where would we be? Thanks Russell, Graham, Jed, Jonni and Mike. You gave us two great shows in two nights and you should know that your fans all had an incredible time and can’t wait for you to show up in their towns again!

Cheers!

Betsy Hijazi attends Air Supply concerts and writes reviews and posts video clips on her blog at http://www.AirSupplyBlog.com http://www.MySpace.com/ASFanBetsy and http://www.YouTube.com/ASFanForLife

Living in the United Kingdom can be expensive especially if you live in London. However, dining out and other leisure activities does not have to leave you out of pocket. Using the following tried and tested tips can save you a lot of money and even get you free meals and days out.

• Book restaurants at Toptable.com - If you dine out a lot then you can save by booking through Toptable. Toptable is a website that allows you to make reservations at hundreds of different restaurants in the UK. It always has 2 for 1, 50% off the bill and plenty of other offers available for different restaurants so you could potentially save a lot of money eating out. Also, every time you make a booking through toptable you are awarded 200 points if you rate the restaurant on the Toptable website after dining there. Once you have collected 1400 points you can get a free 2 or 3 course meal at certain restaurants.

• Cheap cinema tickets - Vue cinema offers standby cinema vouchers for £4.25 plus 50 pence booking fee on Mondays to Thursdays from lastminute.com. A standby cinema voucher can be used to see the latest movies in any Vue cinema which means that you can make a huge saving as Vue cinema tickets can be up to £11.75. Another cheap cinema ticket offer is ???Orange Wednesday???. Every Wednesday you can buy 2 cinema tickets for the price of 1 at practically all cinemas in the UK by texting ???film??? to 241 from your orange mobile and you will then receive a text message with the 2 for 1 voucher that you can use at the cinema.

• Collect Tesco Clubcard Points ??” If you have not already, then join the Tesco Clubcard scheme which gives you 1 point for every pound you spend at Tesco. Each point is worth 1p and when you have collected £2.50 you can either use it to spend on groceries at Tesco or you can exchange it for £10 worth of Clubcard Deals vouchers. These vouchers can then be used for dining out, theme park tickets, magazine subscriptions and plenty of other deals. For example, if you collect £5 worth of Clubcard points, you can exchange this for a £20 Clubcard Deals voucher which could be used for a meal for two. So you are in fact only paying £5 for the meal which is a far better offer than getting £5 off your groceries. Joining the Tesco Clubcard scheme can also save you money on groceries as they will sometimes send you money off vouchers or vouchers for extra points. There are over 2000 Tesco stores in the UK so finding one near to you should not be a problem.

• Shop online - Shopping online is usually cheaper than shopping on the high street. A lot of online retailers also release monthly discount codes which can be used for online purchases to save you even more money on their already discounted prices. Supermarkets online usually award bonus store card points if you purchase online rather than in store and these store card points can then be used for free dinners, movies, etc. so you can save money when going out as well.

• Collect beans tokens with Nescafe ??” If you like to have your daily caffeine fix, you can collect beans tokens on jars of Nescafe instant coffee. These tokens can then be exchanged for free days out as well as other offers. There are a lot of free days out available throughout the UK including museums, ice-skating, bowling and paintballing.

• Get a BMI Baby or Ryanair credit card ??” If you get a BMI Baby or Ryanair credit card and spend any amount on the card after receiving it, you will get a free flight to anywhere in Europe. Ryanair also have an offer that if you buy five Ryanair flights using the credit card, you will get a free flight. As long as you make sure that you pay off your credit card bill fully, you will not incur any expenses.

• Free mobile, free contract and free calls ??” Many companies offer packages where you get a free mobile, free 12 month line rental for a 12 month contract and free cross network minutes and texts. You would be required to pay the line rental each month but you can then claim it back (usually by sending them copies of your phone bills) at certain periods in the year as cashback. So as long as you remember to claim your cashback, you will get everything for free.

About The Author: Stephanie Law is an avid money saver and writes about money saving tips, shopping discounts and freebies. Visit her sites http://www.savemoneyshopping.co.uk/ and http://www.londonerlife.com/

It is actually amazing to see people - outsiders especially - struggle with the phenomenum of BDSM (erotic power exchange if you like). It is, however, just as amazing to see that “the community” seems to forget about the obvious, when it comes to explaining what it is we do.

First this. There is a difference between “defending” and “explaining”. And that, in itself, is a power ritual.

When operating from the “defending” position the defender de facto places him/herself in the underdog position and, through the act of defending, the defender implicitely agrees that he/she is being attacked and - again implicitely - acknowledges that there is a reason for this attack, no matter how futile this reason may be.

Coming form the “explaining” (teaching or informing, if you like) position, he/she who explaines places him/herself in an entirely different position: as an equal in the power-situation or - especially in a teaching-situation - in an even more powerful position. Personally, I prefer the the explaining-position, when it comes to talking to outsiders about BDSM.

Back to the subject at hand.

BDSM is nothing but an explicit (magnified) form of power play between people. And not necessarily limited to the sexuality-issue. In fact, the sexual connotations are probably part of the power-instruments, partners/players have in a BDSM-situation. That is why it would be very helpful if any research on BDSM would be taken OUT of the sexuality corner and into the corner where it belongs: sociology and antropology - i.e. the sciences of the human behavior patterns and cultures.

BDSM doesn’t belong (or at best only partially belongs) in the field dominated by therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists and doctors.

Why, you might ask.

Power dynamics are as normal (and essential) to the human race as eating, drinking, breathing and sleeping. In other words: without it, the human race just doesn’t function the way it does. And neither does any society, human or animal. Just look at a society of monkeys, or lions, or elephants, or starfish and you’ll see power patterns. Patterns that are different from the human ones, but still power patterns. And these power patterns (next to such things as feeding and hunting) almost always apply to sexuality as well. Makes sense, since from an evolutionary point of view reproduction is priority number one. Keeping the species alive and in tact is even more important than breathing or feeding. Evolution doesn’t care if you die - as long as make sure you have taken care of your offspring, so the species continues to exist.

Reproduction = sexuality = inherent power dynamics!

Overpowering is natural (and genetically encoded) and in principle evolution again doesn’t care about moral, legislation and other norms and values. It just cares about reproduction and adaption. And - quite frankly it doesn’t matter who (male or female) takes the initiative - one partner will make sure he or she gets what he/she wants from an evolutionary point of view. Which is: mixing strong genes with other strong genes.

Since adaptation for any species is just as important as reproduction (reproduction in itself is useless if the species doesn’t adapt as well) norms and values are important and as a result will probably become an important part of the lovemaking/reproduction RITUAL. And ritual is the key word in any power driven situation. Ritual and conventions.

Here we go. Labourers and employers have their own rituals, when it comes to playing out the power dynamics between them - for example to gain better wages. Of course everyone knows that strikes will eventually lead to negociations and to an end-result. So if we know we’ll need to negociate sooner or later, what’s the use of a strike or a demonstration? Well, that is the power ritual. And that power ritual is part of the power-dynamics. Much like a mating ritual, actually. Fight first, become friends afterwards and find a solution. The ritual is needed to allow both sides to later explain they were the winner. To each other as well as to the ones they represent. And even more important: the entire powerplay was an effective method to show how much they CARE!

Similar power rituals exist in politics. They do not always seem to make sense, but at least you might argue that since they’ve been around for centuries, we (the human race) apparantly need them. And again the “we are showing we care” argument is just as important as the ritualistic behavior towards each other.

Similar principles apply in schools, or in economic competition, or in the workplace, or ….. well, you name it. There is hardly any area in a human life where there are no power dynamics involved, one way or another. So power dynamics are part of the way we (the human race) behave. Hence it is no surprise power dynamics will also play a role in the sexuality between partners. And they do - even in a non-BDSM context.

So power rituals in a sexual context are nothing new and nothing special. Showing you have power in many cases means: you care!

Hence sexual power play doesn’t belong in the “therapist corner”. You need to eat, otherwise you can’t have sex. That doesn’t turn food-science into an area for sexologists and therapists. You need to work in order to stay alive (and actually your economical success has a huge influence on your ability to mate). That doen’t make economics the area area of psychologists.

In other words: power behavior is normal human behavior and power behavior in (or with) a sexual context is no different.

Next question: is magnifying the power dynamics in a sexual context any different from other power situations?

By designing a system where - and not only for pratical reasons - we elect people to represent our interests when it comes to shaping and controlling the general society, the human race implicitely acknowledges that politics is a profession (although many might argue they’re not) and that an explicit power system is useful. If not, why do we need elections and (probably more importantly) “winners”? Why do we need different ideologies when we could just as well design a system, based on the concept on what is needed and reasonable? One answer is that the human race again needs to be able to see these power struggles going on and as a result identify with the winner of the battle.

The economy simple does not work without competition, although it would probably make a lot more sense to simply share what we have and - as a planet - work together to preserve the planet and grow what we need.

Still, life doesn’t work that way. An important part of marketing is that people want to share the success (of a brand or a product) in order to be able to identify with it. Again we need winners - someone or something with a strong power appeal.

And then we’re not even talking about the appeal of sports!

Not everyone wants to be part of a “power circle”. Not everyone becomes a politician, or a salesman, or an athlete. Some do. In sports, ahtletes are pretty useless without spectators.

In economics, products (and hence product-designers and marketeers) are useless without people buying them. And politicians are useless without the electorate.

So in any situation a small group magnifies the power-dynamics within that groups and plays and works with it. Hence, it only makes sense to expect a group of people to do the same in their lovemaking/sexuality. And yes, some do - they are “into BDSM”.

Apparantly “we” are not much different.

But, there may be something else. “We” have things like fetishes, leather “uniforms” and power symbols such as whips.

Ritualistic behavior again is no different from other power situations. The powerful business world has its own symbols and rituals. Try entering a board-meeting in your jeans and T-shirt. No one will identify you are a powerful economical hotshot. However, dress sharp, buy an Armani suit, a tie, a cellphone, an attache-suitcase and an Audi or a Porsche and EVERYONE will recognize you as one. No different from leather trousers and a whip, I’d say.

A police uniform (among other things) is a symbol of power, so is the doctor’s white coat and the teacher’s jeans and sweater. Most members of any social group will tell you: “if you want to be one, look like one”. Show your colors. You don’t go to a baseball-match wearing your fishing outfit (and most certainly not wearing the colors of the club you do NOT support!).

Each social group - especially when it comes to the power dynamics within that group, has its own “fetishes” and rituals. Again, in sexual behavior things are no different. The “sexual power hotshots” (the BDSM-group) have their own. In principle, leather, whips and cuffs are no different from the Armani suit, the police-uniform and the baseball cap. Different in the way they look, but no different when it comes to function.

If the above is all true, is there any difference when it comes to “picking our battle grounds”, i.e. the “arena” where the power play is being exercized?

I’m afraid the answer again is: not really. Politics belong in their specific “houses”: the capitol, town hall, you name it. Legal battles belong in courthouses. Sports have their arenas and stadiums, the business world has its board and meeting rooms and BDSM has: its dungeons and the bedroom.

In other words: magnified power dynamics is nothing new, when it comes to general human behavior. And magnified power dynamics always require their specific environment, their specific rituals, behavior patterns, lingo, norms and values and fetishes and rituals.

So, no - “we” are no different. We’re actually very human.

Ahthor Hans Meijer (54), former Dutch journalist and currently chairman of the Powerotics Foundation fequently publishes about alternative culture and lifestyles.

There is a large variety of car alarm manufacturers and models for a car owner to research before making the important decision of how to protect their vehicles from would-be car thieves. It can be quite a daunting task to identify and then select from the top ten car alarms available, but a focus on quality and service will serve the owner well. It only makes sense to be sure you are getting a high quality alarm system that is also a good value. It is also very important to determine the most desirable features for your situation and figure out how much you are willing to pay for these features. For example, location tracking capabilities are available with many of the top ten car alarms, but for an additional charge. Such a feature may or may not be imoportant to you.

While tracking location is a great tool for recovering lost vehicles, stopping theft in the first place is often a higher priority for car owners. Examining the top ten car alarm list for these features may offer some different options for your list. The list of the top ten car alarms might adjust even further in consideration of the different types of sensors available for the car alarm system. Even the scope of location tracking can change the content of the top ten car alarm list. Keep in mind that car alarm technolog is advancing every day.

One thing that is relatively constant is the 125-decibel noise level for engaged alarms. Many of the top ten car alarms are equipped with standard door opening switches. Some of them include trunk opening switches, hood opening switches, glass breakage detectors and motion sensors. One of the newest features showing up on the top ten car alarms is advanced technology perimeter motion sensors that can sound an alarm before a would be thief even actually enters the vehicle.

Tilt detectors can stop those thieves who try to steal a vehicle without ever entering it, by towing it to a different location before attempting to enter it. Even code capturing equipment used by thieves to outsmart remote switches can be fought with algorithm code generators which reset remote codes after every use. It is a sad fact, though, that the most determined thieves will generally find a way to work around even the very best of the top ten car alarms.

Still, it is in the best interest of the vehicle owner to protect their vehicles as effectively as possible by closely examining the top ten car alarms for the features that will best guard your automotive investment. After all, you spent a lot of money on your car, and it belongs to you. Protecting your car from would-be thieves is a sound investment in protecting your car. It is vital for car owners to keep in mind, however, that even the most innovative and technologically advanced vehicle protection alarms are worthless if they are not properly engaged. There truly is no point in having a car alarm system if you aren’t going to use it.

You can also find more info on Car Alarms and Best Car Alarms. Bestcaralarmreviews.com is a comprehensive resource to know about Car Alarm.

Sometimes, the best dry dog food is the one that your dog will eat the most. It is easier to buy something that your canine will eat as opposed to having them eat dog food that may be better for them, but one that they may not necessarily like. However, there are a few things you need to consider when you walk down the pet food aisles at your local retailer.

Consider the price of the dry dog food. Often, dry dog food that are cheap or are not branded are made with ingredients like fillers and seasonings that are not necessarily good for dogs. These ingredient may be tasty, but they can be harmful to your dog. These dry dog food often have too much preservatives, which can cause your dog to develop health problems that may eventually cause them to suffer later on in life.

To increase the vitality and life expectancy of your dog, go with good quality dry dog food. You don’t really need to purchase the most expensive dry dog food there is, but it is best if you stick with dry dog food that is manufactured by a reputable dog food company and is priced reasonably.

The main ingredient in the best dry dog food is rice, corn or soybean. High quality dry dog food will also have other ingredients such as beef and chicken. Stores also sell dry dog food formulated specifically to a dog’s age. Manufacturers classify the different types of dry dog food as being for puppies, adult dogs and senior dogs. Purchasing the dry dog food that’s most suitable for your dog’s age is always important.

If you want to know what are the best dry dog foods, ask your veterinarian. Veterinarians would often recommend the branded dry dog foods. These brands are more expensive, but if you have an older dog, it may be to your advantage to pay a little more for the best dry dog food.

You will know if you’ve picked the best dry dog food by the way your dog looks and feels. When you take your dog for yearly shots, his coat should be healthy, his eyes should be clear and he should be full of energy. If your pet doesn’t look well and seems lethargic, there could be something wrong with his diet. It is always wise to keep notes about what your dog is eating on a daily basis. This way, a veterinarian can diagnose your dog more quickly and recommend the best dry dog food for your pet.

George Chao, owner of Digital Excellent Free Online Magazine - http://www.digitalexcellent.com/

Regular exercise can help prevent high blood pressure, and if your blood pressure is already high, exercise can help you control it.

You can strengthen your heart with regular physical activity. The less your heart needs to work, the less force or pressure is exerted on your arteries. For some people exercise alone can reduce the need for blood pressure medication.

If your blood pressure is already at a desirable level, exercise can keep it from rising as you age. Another important key in controlling blood pressure is a healthy weight. Exercise can also help you maintain a healthy weight.

The main core to it all is keeping it up. It takes approximately one to three months of regular exercise to have a stabilizing effect on blood pressure. The benefits received from regular exercise only continue as long as you stay with it.

Any activity that increases your heart and breathing rates is considered aerobic. Common forms of aerobic activity include:

* Mowing the lawn
* Raking leaves
* Scrubbing floors
* Walking in the mall, on scenic trails or a treadmill
* Jogging
* Climbing stairs
* Bicycling
* Swimming
* Dancing

An appropriate goal is at least 30 minutes of aerobic activity most days of the week. Shorter periods of aerobic activity count too if you cannot exercise in one period of time.

You need to check with your doctor first if:

* You are a man older than age 40 or a woman older than age 50
* You smoke
* You are overweight or obese
* You have a chronic health condition, including high blood pressure or high cholesterol
* You have had a heart attack
* You have a family history of heart-related problems before age 55
* You feel pain in your chest or become dizzy with exertion
* You are unsure of whether or not you should start an exercise program
* If you take medication regularly, ask your doctor how the increased activity will affect the way your body reacts to exercise

To keep your aerobic workouts safe and reduce the possibility of injuries:

* Warm up before you exercise
* Cool down after you exercise
* Gradually build up the intensity of your workouts

Seek immediate medical care if you experience any of the following warning signs during exercise:

* Chest pain or tightness
* Dizziness or faintness
* Pain in an arm or your jaw
* Severe shortness of breath
* An irregular heartbeat
* Excessive fatigue

The only way to know for sure that you have high blood pressure is to keep track of your blood pressure readings. If you check your blood pressure using an at home monitoring device, check your blood pressure before you exercise. This will ensure accurate readings.

Source: Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research

Disclaimer: *This article is not meant to diagnose, treat or cure any kind of a health problem. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. Always consult with your health care provider about any kind of a health problem and especially before beginning any kind of an exercise routine.

This article is FREE to publish with the resource box. Article written 3-2007.

Connie Limon, Trilogy Field Representative. Visit http://nutritionandhealthhub.com and sign up for a weekly nutrition and health tip. The article collection is available as FREE reprints for your newsletters, websites or blog. Visit http://www.healthylife27.com to purchase an array of superior quality, safe and effective products inspired by nature, informed by science and created to improve the health of people, pets and the planet.

There are not too many better ways of getting fit than utilizing a cheap treadmill. A treadmill is one of the most convenient ways to get fit today; just punch a few buttons, and off you go.

You need to be careful, however, when deicing which machine is right for you; not all treadmills are created equal. If you aren???t cautious, you can end up spending hand over fist for a slightly higher quality treadmill that you really didn???t need. Here is a review of some of the best and most popular cheap treadmills that will help you reach your workout goals without breaking the bank.

Weslo Cadence C44 treadmill ($329.97): This is the king of cheap treadmills. The design is excellent, and will last any workout enthusiast for many years. The speed adjusts from 1 to 10 miles per hour, in .1 increments. The belt comes at a big enough size and width to accommodate longer strides, making it perfect for bigger work-out enthusiasts.

The control panel is very easy to figure out; you don???t need an MIT degree to figure out what all the buttons do and how to set up your workout. Overall, the Weslo is a very high quality treadmill that comes with a very affordable price tag.

Merit 710T treadmill ($314) Another popular cheap treadmill that directly competes with the Weslo. The design is excellent, and is built to last. However, the Merit is somewhat difficult to assemble; make sure you have an experienced person with you when attempting to do this.

Also, the control panel can be challenging to figure out, as the instructions are not very well laid out. The motor runs well, and without any problems. The Merit is a nice treadmill for the cheap price, but if you have the choice, opt for the Weslo.

The bottom line? If you are on a budget, yet still want a computerized treadmill with the look and feel of a more expensive model, the Weslo is the way to go. This is the top cheap treadmill around, and can give you a great bang for the buck, and ultimately keep you fit for years to come.

For more treadmill comparisons, whether they be cheap treadmills or high-end models, and to find out how to achieve your fitness goals, try visiting http://www.online-treadmill-reviews.com.